This Still Counts As One Beer

[Eric]

Right?

 

[Huaco Kid]

I was at a bar once, and ordered a pitcher. The bartender asked how many cups? I said, "One."

He said, "I can't sell you a pitcher with only one cup."

I said, "Two cups."

And he gave me a pitcher. With two cups.

[Eric]

12 minutes ago, Huaco Kid said:

I was at a bar once, and ordered a pitcher. The bartender asked how many cups? I said, "One."

He said, "I can't sell you a pitcher with only one cup."

I said, "Two cups."

And he gave me a pitcher. With two cups.

To be fair, you have two hands. You do have two hands, right?

[Maser]

20 minutes ago, Huaco Kid said:

I was at a bar once, and ordered a pitcher. The bartender asked how many cups? I said, "One."

He said, "I can't sell you a pitcher with only one cup."

I said, "Two cups."

And he gave me a pitcher. With two cups.

 

"Two Cups, One Pitcher" is the lesser known viral internet video. 

[geeorge]

21 minutes ago, Huaco Kid said:

I was at a bar once, and ordered a pitcher. The bartender asked how many cups? I said, "One."

He said, "I can't sell you a pitcher with only one cup."

I said, "Two cups."

And he gave me a pitcher. With two cups.

I would have told him no cups and drank straight from the pitcher

[jmohme]

1 hour ago, Eric said:

Right?

 

Now that is a Nobel Prize worthy idea!

[Eric]

 

[Eric]

 

[Huaco Kid]

We never did "Edward 40hands", but my nephews have fond memories.

[Eric]

We had a lot of drinking games, when I was in the Army. Quarters was sort of passé, but it got quite a bit of play. One of our favorites was a drinking game that utilized a deck of cards, called Up and Down the River. Anyone else heard of it? We also had drinking games involving TV shows and movies popular at the time. One of the favorites was the Hi Bob game, where we would watch Bob Newhart and drinking whenever anyone said his name. That game was good for a buzz. If we wanted to get hammered, we would watch Scarface and drinking whenever someone said ****. Some intrepid souls would try to make it through the whole moving doing shots instead of drinking beer, but that usually ended up with the contestant hugging a toilet bowl, or maybe a trashcan.

The only time I ever got blackout drunk was one night when I got back to the barracks drunk from a party at a friend's apartment and some old dicks (In The Old Guard, if you were there less than a year, you were a New Dick. If you were there more than two years, you were an Old Dick) talked me into playing quarters with Jack Daniels. I won't go into details, but a couple of amusing but embarrassing things and one kind of scary thing happened while I was blacked out. To this day, I still get nauseous when I smell whiskey.

[tous]

As Naval officers and gentlemen, we would have a glass of port or sherry whilst playing bridge occasionally, but off duty and ashore, of course. 

I said it then and I'll say it now.

No one gets drunk better than a Marine.

No one.

 

[Fog]

It's one beer, but lucky you gets to drink it four times.

[Batesmotel]

I would get my mom a glass of wine for her dinner when I was a kid. The size of the glass depended on how much of a pain in my ass she had been that day. Same thing went if she wanted a Seven Up and Black Velvet. Some days I had a lot of Seven Up left over. 

[janice6]

5 hours ago, Eric said:

Right?

 

Are you sure it isn't a means to raise the price by making you get less beer in a smaller glass, while paying the same price for "a glass of beer"?

[janice6]

4 hours ago, geeorge said:

I would have told him no cups and drank straight from the pitcher

While in the navy, at the em club I would sit in an overstuffed chair and watch TV I would order a pitcher of beer and a bag of chips.  If the chips went first I would order another pitcher of beer.  usually I would start to see double on the TV then I would go back to my ship and sleeeeeeeeeeeeeep.

[janice6]

4 hours ago, Huaco Kid said:

I was at a bar once, and ordered a pitcher. The bartender asked how many cups? I said, "One."

He said, "I can't sell you a pitcher with only one cup."

I said, "Two cups."

And he gave me a pitcher. With two cups.

My first day in Charleston, S.C I ordered a beer at the bar.  I picked it up and started to walk to a booth and the place exploded.  A waitress ran to me to grab my beer and asked me what I was doing?  I said I was going to sit down.  She said I couldn't carry a beer while walking.  I said, "Watch me!".  She said it's against the law here.  I was stunned.  So if I wanted to change places she would come and carry my beer to the new place I wanted to go to.  I thought southerners had some real problems!

[Walt Longmire]

Keggers in the woods of the PNW. 

[pipedreams]

12 hours ago, janice6 said:

My first day in Charleston, S.C I ordered a beer at the bar.  I picked it up and started to walk to a booth and the place exploded.  A waitress ran to me to grab my beer and asked me what I was doing?  I said I was going to sit down.  She said I couldn't carry a beer while walking.  I said, "Watch me!".  She said it's against the law here.  I was stunned.  So if I wanted to change places she would come and carry my beer to the new place I wanted to go to.  I thought southerners had some real problems!

Wonder if those laws still exist.  When I was in, I ran into the same thing in Colorado I think.  I though they were joking.  Another strange one was private clubs only.  Went with a friend over the weekend to Kansas and he took me to a members only club.  Seems no hard liquor was allowed in public bars, beer only but you could join a club and take your bottle with you to the club.  Bartender would write your name on the bottle and set it up on the counter behind the bar.  When you left you could either take your bottle with you or leave it for your next visit.  Been a long time ago but that's the best I remember.

[Huaco Kid]

12 hours ago, janice6 said:

She said it's against the law here.

Long ago,  the bars in Houston had a lot of "free beer" nights.  Then they passed a law that made that illegal.  So they had "5¢ beer" nights,  and would leave buckets of nickles on the bar.

Dad lived in a dry county.  If you wanted a drink at the restaurant,  you had to join the private members-only club.  We asked what that involved.

They wrote your name on an index card, and it was $1 for a lifetime membership

[Eric]

8 hours ago, Huaco Kid said:

Long ago,  the bars in Houston had a lot of "free beer" nights.  Then they passed a law that made that illegal.  So they had "5¢ beer" nights,  and would leave buckets of nickles on the bar.

Dad lived in a dry county.  If you wanted a drink at the restaurant,  you had to join the private members-only club.  We asked what that involved.

They wrote your name on an index card, and it was $1 for a lifetime membership

San Antonio used to have some 'bars' that didn't have liquor licenses. You brought your own alcohol. It's been 35 years since I lived there and I don't remember how it all worked. I think they could sell you packaged beer and stuff, but they couldn't serve it. It was a weird setup.

Texas in general has some weird and often inconsistent & conflicting laws regarding alcohol. Hell, they didn't repeal the Blue Laws until like 1984. To this day, the state is a random patchwork of wet and dry counties and wet & dry districts within cities. Places where it is legal to buy liquor on one side of the street and not the other and even places where you can only sell beer and wine in one place and a few blocks away, you can sell and serve everything.

[Huaco Kid]

Some of the best back-in-the-woods redneck bars couldn't sell liquor. I think you could buy a sixpack and sit there and drink it.

But they'd have a 6'x6' shack out front any you could buy bottles and mixers and take them in and drink them. You paid 50¢ for each cup of ice.

And everybody would leave with open bottles in the car. I actually think you were allowed to do that back then.

[Eric]

In Dallas, Texas Stadium was on one side of the freeway and the original Six Flags Over Texas Amusement Park was on the other side. I forget now which was which, but one was in a dry district and one wasn't. You could hit one with a rock from the other, but you couldn't buy alcohol in one of them.

 

Edited To Add: It was Texas Stadium where you couldn't buy alcohol. The city of Irving repeatedly refused to change the zoning to allow it. It was OK to drink and ride roller coasters, but not watch football.

[janice6]

9 hours ago, pipedreams said:

Wonder if those laws still exist.  When I was in, I ran into the same thing in Colorado I think.  I though they were joking.  Another strange one was private clubs only.  Went with a friend over the weekend to Kansas and he took me to a members only club.  Seems no hard liquor was allowed in public bars, beer only but you could join a club and take your bottle with you to the club.  Bartender would write your name on the bottle and set it up on the counter behind the bar.  When you left you could either take your bottle with you or leave it for your next visit.  Been a long time ago but that's the best I remember.

It's pretty vague to me after all these years, but I believe I ran into the same thing in Salt Lake City where you couldn't by alcohol but you could "join" a club and either get your alcohol there or bring it in with you, I was quite puzzled by that arrangement. 

[Huaco Kid]

We'd go to concerts in Dallas. (me and dallas had nothing in common (houston too) so we never went there.) Waco was boozy. Dallas was drinky.

The distance between them was a desert of dry.

If you wanted to be primed before you got to the concert, you plan ahead.

Both ways.

[jmohme]

9 hours ago, janice6 said:

It's pretty vague to me after all these years, but I believe I ran into the same thing in Salt Lake City where you couldn't by alcohol but you could "join" a club and either get your alcohol there or bring it in with you, I was quite puzzled by that arrangement. 

I seem to recall that being the case when I first moved to Bastrop. I think there was one place that served alcohol, and it was a members only bar.

Fast forward to present and now the same town has two breweries, a few wineries with tasting rooms, a distillery that sells and offers samples of moonshine, and every eatery in town serves beer and wine, some even have full bars. But liquor stores are still closed on Sundays.