theglock Posted June 22, 2019 Share Posted June 22, 2019 Toenails!! Who decided those were a good idea? And the older I get the more I hate them. Especially that little one at the far reaches of my right foot. Yet they continue to grow. Oblivious to my disdain and to my struggle to clip them. :^< 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted June 22, 2019 Share Posted June 22, 2019 Claws. Blame Darwin. I can still reach my toenails. Heck, I could bite them if I wanted to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silentpoet Posted June 22, 2019 Share Posted June 22, 2019 11 if you live near chernobyl. 3 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dric902 Posted June 22, 2019 Share Posted June 22, 2019 Very lickable on the right person. Or so I hear . 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted June 22, 2019 Share Posted June 22, 2019 11 minutes ago, Dric902 said: Very lickable on the right person. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dric902 Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 3 hours ago, Huaco Kid said: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al Czervik Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 I wear flip-flops most of the year, so I like my feet to look as nice as possible. I get a pedicure every couple of weeks with Mrs. C. The nice young ladies dip your feet in different jell-O like substances, trim, scrape, and sand as necessary, all while you are in a massage chair. You may even be provided an adult beverage. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 8 minutes ago, Al Czervik said: I wear flip-flops most of the year, so I like my feet to look as nice as possible. I get a pedicure every couple of weeks with Mrs. C. The nice young ladies dip your feet in different jell-O like substances, trim, scrape, and sand as necessary, all while you are in a massage chair. You may even be provided an adult beverage. Yeah. No. I haven't owned flip-flops since forever. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al Czervik Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 6 minutes ago, Huaco Kid said: Yeah. No. I haven't owned flip-flops since forever. Try out a pair of OluKai leather flops. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silentpoet Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 4 hours ago, Dric902 said: Very lickable on the right person. Or so I hear . TMI Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
holyjohnson Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 you know you can pay people to do that for you. unless your too ticklish.... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KWalrad Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 How do people with only one arm cut their finger nails? 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 3 minutes ago, KWalrad said: How do people with only one arm cut their finger nails? One at a time. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KWalrad Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 1 minute ago, Huaco Kid said: One at a time. Genius! Ever seen a person so fat that they had to tie a beach towel to the doorknob and straddle it to wipe their butt? Or they had to use the cat? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NPTim Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 6 hours ago, Huaco Kid said: Worse case of warts EVER. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tadbart Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 Dude. Gimme fifty bucks, a hedge lopper, and a half gallon of Jack. We'll solve this problem real quick. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gwalchmai Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 8 hours ago, Al Czervik said: I wear flip-flops most of the year, so I like my feet to look as nice as possible. I get a pedicure every couple of weeks with Mrs. C. The nice young ladies dip your feet in different jell-O like substances, trim, scrape, and sand as necessary, all while you are in a massage chair. You may even be provided an adult beverage. Cucumber water? I may consider that. I have a couple of "pinch calluses" on my big toes and a rogue little toenail like the OP mentioned. I shaved off one of the calluses the other day but it'd be nicer to have someone else do it "long time". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al Czervik Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 2 hours ago, gwalchmai said: Cucumber water? I may consider that. I have a couple of "pinch calluses" on my big toes and a rogue little toenail like the OP mentioned. I shaved off one of the calluses the other day but it'd be nicer to have someone else do it "long time". Fermented grapes, probably from Chateau du Boxe. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moshe Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 here are six things the Lord hates, seven that are detestable to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes, feet that are quick to rush into evil, a false witness who pours out lies and a person who stirs up conflict in the community. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxmanta Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 (edited) I think we're ignoring the big question here, which is: do toenails (as a group) constitute one big thing or ten smaller things? Discuss. Edited June 23, 2019 by Maxmanta Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silentpoet Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 7 minutes ago, Maxmanta said: I think we're ignoring the big question here, which is: do toenails (as a group) constitute one big thing or ten smaller things? Discuss. And at 3 mile island do tentacles count. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
holyjohnson Posted June 23, 2019 Share Posted June 23, 2019 9 minutes ago, Maxmanta said: I think we're ignoring the big question here, which is: do toenails (as a group) constitute one big thing or ten smaller things? Discuss. are we paying the hooker per hour or by day,that is a huge part of the equation... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al Czervik Posted June 24, 2019 Share Posted June 24, 2019 15 minutes ago, holyjohnson said: are we paying the hooker per hour or by day,that is a huge part of the equation... I think it is generally accepted that the hooker is already dead and in the trunk. The question then becomes, did you pay in advance for the necrophilia? 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KWalrad Posted June 24, 2019 Share Posted June 24, 2019 48 minutes ago, holyjohnson said: are we paying the hooker per hour or by day,that is a huge part of the equation... One does not pay a hooker per hour or by day. One pays a hooker TO LEAVE once their purpose has been achieved. ...or so I am told. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al Czervik Posted June 24, 2019 Share Posted June 24, 2019 16 minutes ago, KWalrad said: One does not pay a hooker per hour or by day. One pays a hooker TO LEAVE once their purpose has been achieved. ...or so I am told. I've always paid for MY purpose....wait, no, never mind. I've never paid a hooker for.....what is a hooker, and why is there a dead one in my trunk? Damn you Walrad. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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