Huaco's Hijack

[Huaco Kid]

On 6/18/2023 at 3:50 AM, tous said:

Those NHL guys do a 40-second shift, come back to the bench and drink their bespoke magic hydration elixirs.

 

We had rusty-pipe water.  Not even warm.  Hot.

Later,  I was at an NHL game,  and went out back later, to see them all come out.

They were all chugging gallon bottles of Pedialyte.

So,  I'd bring my own to the games.

[Huaco Kid]

Gatorade,  at $4 / quart is sugar and salt.

[Huaco Kid]

There's a museum and souvenir store, in a house, across the street. It was closed.

I left pretty quick, because the white-power house, down the street, with all the white-t-shirt guys, and all the pumping-weight-stations in the front yard, were, make you want to leave quickly.

It's a very-close downtown Cleveland neighborhood.

They probably keep stealing all the decoder pins.

[Huaco Kid]

They probably drink a lot of Ovaltine.

"Dang! Why do they keep telling us the same thing?!?"

[Huaco Kid]

B-12.

[Huaco Kid]

Ours were rings. We never wore them on our fingers, but in our pocket.

Someone would write the daily code on a big rock (we were never code-man. it was a secret-society) in front of the school (B-12)

And then, you'd have to check the pencil-sharpener shavings-cup in each classroom, to see whoever put a message in there. Might be the pop-test answers.
Or might be, "You are a fag."

We had to check first.

[tous]

1 hour ago, Huaco Kid said:

They probably drink a lot of Ovaltine.

"Dang! Why do they keep telling us the same thing?!?"

Clanky was better.  Came in a space robot bottle.

Bosco was best.

Chex cereals were the place to go for secret decoder rings in the 1950s.

Dad only bought Raisin Bran 

Secret messages were wasted on me.

 

[Huaco Kid]

"Son, I don't understand a word you just said."

[Huaco Kid]

And, I'm not a moomin with some big hat on my head.

[Huaco Kid]

I don't remember where we got ours.

Busy Bee?

Cracker Jack.

[Huaco Kid]

We never had Ovaline.

Mom didn't get the memo.

[Huaco Kid]

I think we learned the code-thing in Boy Scouts.

You didn't even need hardware.

Just the code.

Dad was Navy.

He taught me when I was a toddler.

"Go. To. Bed."

f you, Dad.

[tous]

The world needs more Moomins, fewer Smurfs.

 

[Huaco Kid]

Your eyes are all crossed, funny.

[Huaco Kid]

Not funny, Ha Ha.

Funny queer.

[Huaco Kid]

(that was a movie reference,  don't take it personally)

But you are.

[Huaco Kid]

Dad would make the "Battleship" game on graph paper,  (Dad was an engineer,  he LOVED graph paper)

But he would also draw your ships in.  He always won.  We never figured it out.

"If you lose,  you have to take a shower tonight AND tomorrow,  and cook me eggs."

"OK."

[Huaco Kid]

Dad listened to the baseball game, at work in the afternoon.

In the evening, drinking beer on the back porch, at the bottom of the sixth, at 9 t0 2,   he'd say, "Bet you three showers, and two lawnmoings, that they win this game."

A good Dad will lie to your face.

 

I learned it like that.
 

[Huaco Kid]

Dad was a baseball encyclopedia.

He played minor-pro ball.

He coached my brother into AllStar greatness.

I was just a hockey *****,  that was pretty anti-dad.

[Huaco Kid]

He said,  they were at work lunch, Forbes Field,  at Pirates practice, in the very top row.

Clemente drove one off, killing,  that hit the seat between them,  broke all the wood in the seat.  and bounced all the way back into the field.

[Huaco Kid]

Dad would sit on the back porch,  looking over the valley, every night,  drinking Arn City.  and keeping score on his manager sheet.

He used to make me keep up,  when he went to p..

Squares, smaller squares, on his graph sheet.

2-0

Walk.

 

Pencil mark, over-x, three,  fowl off.

[Huaco Kid]

Dad could brick you with a 2x4,  it was his forte.

[Huaco Kid]

Dads rule was:  IF  you're going to play hockey,  at three mother-******* AM  when the outside rink was open.  your gonna play fn hockey.

[Huaco Kid]

He.ll tip the bed on you.

[Huaco Kid]

And skate 50 squirt tweeds.