Excuse Creator

[Eric]

Take it for a spin.

"I couldn't go because a British chap crapped in my gas tank." Bastard.

[DWARREN123]

I could have used that a few hundred times!

[C_Hallbert]

“I was late because that same obnoxious British Chap, pissed in my gas tank!”


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[janice6]

There was an extended period in time when I believed my company management used this for most of their "edicts".

http://projects.wsj.com/buzzwords2014/#p=6|3|22||3||0

 

[Boogieman]

It got to the point a few years ago that if during a meeting some suit said "synergy" "cloud based" "sustainable" or "it is what it is" one more time I was going to start taking hostages.

[Huaco Kid]

"It was the Ambien."

That seems to be the innocent go-to excuse lately.

[C_Hallbert]

There was an extended period in time when I believed my company management used this for most of their "edicts".
http://projects.wsj.com/buzzwords2014/#p=6|3|22||3||0
 

Some years ago our Organization’s Administration decided that to improve morale and employee satisfaction, managers were directed to encourage employee participation in determining organizational goals, creating measurable departmental objectives, creating personal performance objectives, identifying potential problems and solutions to achieve those objectives. Characteristics of Servant Leadership were defined proclaimed as the standards by which management performance was to be assessed.

It was a Clusterfucation! ! Most of my staff hated it. Those that thought was going to be a good idea soon learned that subsequent phases of the program required that they assume responsibility for specific functions for which they were held accountable. Ah! That was the rub! The novelty soon wore off and they wanted to go back to their traditional tasks.

During this period of transition, there were some management changes which consisted of the elimination of some positions and subsequent consolidation of some unrelated departments to maintain a command structure. They left my area alone because it had a unique domain and it was self sustaining.

The program was an expensive and frustrating boondoggle, but it was only an ominous prelude to the next fiasco that would be force-fed to the unsuspecting employee population...... The Disney Customer Service Program............’It Has No Place In Healthcare!’; or ‘Bad Idea, Hospitals Are Not Disneyland!’


We were forced to go through the motions.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[janice6]

I hated acronyms and In my industry they were everywhere.  Anyway, at one conference our VP was presenting his version of a new program initiative.  During his "pep" talk, he us an acronym for a weapons system I was unfamiliar with.  I stopped him and asked him to elaborate on the system for the benefit of those of us who weren't familiar with it.  He was stunned.  No one had done this before, and when cornered, he really didn't know the system, just the acronym for it.  Fortunately, one of the other attendees did know the system and filled us in on the details.  After that, I asked for definitions every time an acronym was used in a conference and it became apparent that BS wouldn't slide by.  Some thanked me for my actions.

 

Another time we had a new CEO of our corporation.  He came to alleviate the concerns of our Division and gave a presentation of our future direction at a general meeting.  I cannot be "late", even socially late.  So when I walked into the conference room, it was the new CEO and me, no one else was there.  I have a hearing problem and I would always sit as close to the speaker as I could so I knew what he/she was saying.

He smiled at me and asked why I was the first one there and chose to sit right in the front.  Most people liked to take a seat further back to stay innocuous. I have always been rather forthright, and my answer to him was that I wanted to make sure he didn't pull any shenanigans on us.   Surprisingly he just laughed, and during the presentation, thanked me by name for making sure he stayed on principle.

 

 

Edited August 19, 2018 by janice6

[C_Hallbert]

I hated acronyms and In my industry they were everywhere.  Anyway, at one conference our VP was presenting his version of a new program initiative.  During his "pep" talk, he us an acronym for a weapons system I was unfamiliar with.  I stopped him and asked him to elaborate on the system for the benefit of those of us who weren't familiar with it.  He was stunned.  No one had done this before, and when cornered, he really didn't know the system, just the acronym for it.  Fortunately, one of the other attendees did know the system and filled us in on the details.  After that, I asked for definitions every time an acronym was used in a conference and it became apparent that BS wouldn't slide by.  Some thanked me for my actions.

 

Another time we had a new CEO of our corporation.  He came to alleviate the concerns of our Division and gave a presentation of our future direction at a general meeting.  I cannot be "late", even socially late.  So when I walked into the conference room, it was the new CEO and me, no one else was there.  I have a hearing problem and I would always sit as close to the speaker as I could so I knew what he/she was saying.

He smiled at me and asked why I was the first one there and chose to sit right in the front.  Most people liked to take a seat further back to stay innocuous. I have always been rather forthright, and my answer to him was that I wanted to make sure he didn't pull any shenanigans on us.   Surprisingly he just laughed, and during the presentation, thanked me by name for making sure he stayed on principle.

 

 

Janice, I believe we would get along fine. One of my favorite past CEOs more than once told me, “Don’t say it.....”. To which I would reply, “I think what I have to say is important.” He would consent and after my statement he would say something like, “We were hopping that nobody would pick up on that.” I could usually see the BS before it hit the fan.... LOL.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[janice6]

I used to have the most entertaining talks with the VP of Engineering during coffee breaks.  I told him the truth.  He seemed to appreciate it.

[holyjohnson]

" i couldn't help it,the ghost of Margaret thatcher spin-kicked me in the collar bone"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

she didn't believe me

 

 

 

Edited August 19, 2018 by holyjohnson
ran a test

[Dynactus]

After years in big pharma, my first thought regarding upper mgt. is: I don't mind that you lie to me, it's just that you think I'm stupid enough to believe it that pisses me off so.

[RenoF250]

3 hours ago, Huaco Kid said:

"It was the Ambien."

That seems to be the innocent go-to excuse lately.

 

I THOUGHT THE BITCH WAS WHITE!!!!!