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Climate change: We are running out of money

Gas prices: The other guy did it

Inflation: Ditto

Democracy: Opposition leader arrested, opposition party banished, government control of MSM

Defending democracy: We paid a lot of money to elite children

No-fly zone: Time for the other kids to give up their lives

Voting rights: Oh, yeah. Not to be confused with right to vote

Conservative values: Racist, treasonous, sooo passé

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