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Things That Usta...


Eric
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Get you yelled at:

  • Letting the screen door slam. I don't care how big a hurry you were in, you didn't let that happen.
  • Getting dirt on the laundry on the clotheslines, or even playing too close. That brought swift and terrible retribution.
  • Failing to light a match after you did your business in the bathroom.
  • Failing to refill the ice tray, if you used the last cubes. There was always someone who would leave one cube, to try to dodge that duty. It is a wonder that I have fingerprints today, after growing up with those freaking aluminum icetrays.

Whatcha got?

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Being in the house after about noon on a summer and/or weekend day. You got told to GTFO and do kid stuff, or if you were really unlucky, mama found some chores for you to do.

I think being a mom and a housewife back then was a lot like being Scotty, on Star Trek. They were hard-working and clever as hell, but they wanted you to think that they worked harder than they actually did. They couldn't very well put their feet up and watch TV with a bunch of little witnesses running around. I wonder how many times Scotty gave the captain an, "She giving you all she's got!!!", when he had his feet up drinking a space beer and watch a soccer game on the holotube?

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One of the biggest no-nos, one that would bring the hammer down on adults and kids alike, was walking across a freshly mopped, or (God forbid) waxed floor. I believe that is considered grounds for a justifiable homicide in 37 states.

Why is it that mopped gets an extra letter and waxed doesn't? Our language is screwy. It's a conspiracy, I tell you.

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Drinking the last of the milk. Mom was a SERIOUS coffee drinker. She had to have sugar and extra milk. If I ever used the last ounce of milk I was walking to the store for more. 
 

Turning the heat up if I didn’t already have a sweater on.

Burning anything on the stove. This only became an issue after I burned up the kitchen. Mom was a little paranoid after the fire. I’ll give her that one. 
 

Moving her blouses out of the dryer. She would dry them then take them out as she needed them. If I touched them she said I permanently wrinkled them. Then I got smacked. I needed to move them so I could do my laundry. Frankly she did it just to screw with me. 
 

Plus about a hundred other things based on old superstitions. Those pissed me off. 

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You know, a lot of folks never locked their doors back then, but there has never been a sneak-thief or ninja stealthy enough to get past an old screendoor without everyone in the house knowing about it. Any of you ever try to sneak out of the house past a screendoor, after bedtime?

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3 minutes ago, ChuteTheMall said:

Our refrigerator was called an icebox, the stereo was called a Victrola, and the sofa was called a Davenport.  Old people had their own language.

I had to stop using the term boobtube. Everyone thought I was some sort of perv.

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3 minutes ago, Mrs.Cicero said:

Speaking while Dad was watching the evening news.  Not finishing all the food on the plate (God help you if it was pickled beets).  Mouthing off to Mom.

Yep, "You aren't leaving the table until...!!!"

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1 hour ago, Mrs.Cicero said:

Mouthing off to Mom.

If I talked back I got beat. If I held my tongue I got beat. Either way I got beat. Then she told dad and I got beat again. 
 

It was just easier to speak my mind regardless. Still got beat but I felt better. Eventually dad got a clue that mom was nuts. 

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1 minute ago, Batesmotel said:

If I talked back I got beat. If I held my tongue I got beat. Either way I got beat. Then she told dad and I got beat again. 
 

It was just easier to speak my mind regardless. Still got beat but I felt better. Eventually dad got a clue that mom was nuts. 

My mom's Kobayashi Maru when she was yelling at us was to ask, "Who do you think you are!?" She expected an answer and there was NO right answer. An ass-kicking always followed.

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2 minutes ago, Eric said:

My mom's Kobayashi Maru when she was yelling at us was to ask, "Who do you think you are!?" She expected an answer and there was NO right answer. An ass-kicking always followed.

Sounds real familiar.
 

Let me guess. “What were you thinking?” Got the same results.

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24 minutes ago, misterfox said:

Perry Mason.

We would go to my Aunt's house - and if Perry Mason was on - the Mothers, Aunts, etc HAD TO WATCH IT.

If any of us kids made any sound during Perry Mason - we would be grease spots on the carpet.

Hearing the Perry Mason music meant time to go to bed. WAY to early. 

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