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Schmidt Meister's Grab Bag


Schmidt Meister
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3 hours ago, Schmidt Meister said:

Most thinking people correctly consider the twist-tie to be one of the greatest single inventions of the 20th century. While the integrated circuit, penicillin and heavier than air flight all have their places, frankly none of these have had the same impact as the twist-tie in terms of convenience and usefulness to all mankind. Invented by Charles E. Burford in 1961, this miracle of versatility has countless uses, and as long as it is used properly, greatly enhances our daily lives. When used improperly, however, it becomes a vicious little bastard that is unusually difficult to operate and becomes the source of great frustration.

How does one use a twist-tie incorrectly, you ask? It should be obvious, it should be accepted as common-sense, but you use them incorrectly by twisting the damn things closed in a counter-clockwise direction, that's how. It is universally acknowledged the correct way to close a twist-tie is in a clockwise direction. They are opened, or "un-tied" in a counter-clockwise direction. Have you ever needed a slice of bread and found that some sadistic left-handed bakery worker has defied convention and closed the damn thing the wrong way? Are these people not supervised? C'mon, man! This is like Day 1 bakery training stuff. It's not who we are!

I again recently encountered this frustrating situation and was forced to waste precious time in making a sandwich while untangling the twist-tie. Such sloppy work is unprofessional, inconvenient to the user, and yet one more sign of the decline our once great American society. It is something you would expect from a company that simply does not care about quality or placing a premium on customer service, but rather celebrates mediocrity. Until we take attention to detail seriously, we will remain a fundamentally unserious people.

Twist-Tie.jpg

First tighten it one way, then tighten it the other way, then switch again. 

Less destructive than watching the world burn, and she'll be laughed out of divorce court.

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I LOVE my wife. She's so much more than just my mate, she's my best friend, my soul soother, my go-to conversationalist, and my musical and humor equal. I've told her several times that store bought cards can never do my feelings for her justice so I'm on an endless hunt for ways to tell her of my love. Humor is my best medium. I recently found this picture and it earned me the best hug and kiss. She is everything to me.

Bananas - Spooning.jpg

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30 minutes ago, Schmidt Meister said:

I LOVE my wife. She's so much more than just my mate, she's my best friend, my soul soother, my go-to conversationalist, and my musical and humor equal. I've told her several times that store bought cards can never do my feelings for her justice so I'm on an endless hunt for ways to tell her of my love. Humor is my best medium. I recently found this picture and it earned me the best hug and kiss. She is everything to me.

Bananas - Spooning.jpg

It's wonderful that two married people can find love together after being next to each other after a long time.  KUDOs brother!

This is what my wife found in the refrigerator one morning.  She laughed out loud.

egg-face-art-47.jpg

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40 minutes ago, janice6 said:

It's wonderful that two married people can find love together after being next to each other after a long time.  KUDOs brother!

This is what my wife found in the refrigerator one morning.  She laughed out loud.

egg-face-art-47.jpg

I copied this.  This is a file picture.

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4 minutes ago, railfancwb said:

True. How deep would the purges have to go to clean up the FBI, much less the CIA. 

If we are ever able to overcome the voter cheating that the Democrats seem to have almost perfected and take over the top job in America, we should dump the barrel and sanitize it and start over. Only the most tested, ardent Constitutionalists and legal scholars should be allowed back in. It always bothered me that Trump didn't do more of a purge while he had the chance. That would have saved America a lot of heartache and suffering.

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2 hours ago, Schmidt Meister said:

If we are ever able to overcome the voter cheating that the Democrats seem to have almost perfected and take over the top job in America, we should dump the barrel and sanitize it and start over. Only the most tested, ardent Constitutionalists and legal scholars should be allowed back in. It always bothered me that Trump didn't do more of a purge while he had the chance. That would have saved America a lot of heartache and suffering.

Obama lost no time purging the ranks - especially in the upper military. 

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