deputy tom Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 2 hours ago, DAKA said: All he needed in addition was a ZIPPO...Just step back and chuck it at them Umm roasted hijacker When I worked at a gas station as a teen I carried a Zippo lighter just in case someone was trying to rob me. Hose 'em down and flick the Zippo. Problem solved. tom. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Historian Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 8 minutes ago, deputy tom said: When I worked at a gas station as a teen I carried a Zippo lighter just in case someone was trying to rob me. Hose 'em down and flick the Zippo. Problem solved. tom. I don't smoke....often...and still carry one. It's like having a Case pocket knife in your pocket. If your pants are on some things are obligated. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MO Fugga Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 3 hours ago, Schmidt Meister said: Or a flare gun .... I used to keep one in the glove box a long time ago. Wish I never sold my Spike's HAVOC 37mm. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MO Fugga Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 3 hours ago, Schmidt Meister said: Or a flare gun .... Double tap. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batesmotel Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 52 minutes ago, deputy tom said: When I worked at a gas station as a teen I carried a Zippo lighter just in case someone was trying to rob me. Hose 'em down and flick the Zippo. Problem solved. tom. We had an axe with a shortened handle at one of our stations. It got used a couple times. I used it once. Took out a rear window of a car. Cops had an easy time finding it. My great uncle preferred a brick. Beaned one guy up side of the head for stealing oil. Different days. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pipedreams Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 1 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MO Fugga Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 50 minutes ago, pipedreams said: One neighbor finally figured out that it is indeed not a tennis racquet in the case. Wherever you go, you never know if the home team wants to force a, umm, match. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gwalchmai Posted September 10, 2021 Share Posted September 10, 2021 4 hours ago, Schmidt Meister said: Or a flare gun .... Be honest - how many of you are humming "Smoke on the Water"? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 One of the first thing's I do in a rental car, is push the "eject" button on the cd player. It's not uncommon for something to spit out. There's a 1% chance it'll be something you like. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 Some suburban family, all renting the minivan to go visit Grandma at the beach, got in and hit the road!..... And then Metallica Live **** started emanating, at near full blast, throughout all their ear-buds and i-pads. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 This really just happened. So, I have a 2-gallon aquarium on my desk right in front of my face, for decades, that I usually had a betta in. (I could keep a beta alive for 5+ years), but it's been a long time. It's been an empty, bubbling tank. On the other wall is a 45 gal, that I always grew (tiger) oscar's in. (the last one was as big as a football, and 10+ years when he got too big for it. I was trying to give him away, but he floated. So now there's only 50 guppies and and the red-tailed shark (not a rainbow shark, they're gay) in there. I put them all in 10 years ago. The shark was 1" long (he's easily 7+ years). Now he's probably pushing 5". He owns the roost. If I'm gone too long, he just eats 50 baby guppies. The guppy population has maintained itself exactly the same for a long time. They're probably all pretty in-bred, by now. So I decided to put some guppies in the little tank. Like a little guppy farm. In case the shark gets hungry. I picked a M and a F from the big tank. Put them in a cup, was floating the cup for temp, and noticed that one had already got out. So I dumped the cup into the tank. But there was only one fish in the tank. I checked the tank, cup, desk, ten times. One fish. Gone. I know it jumped out. They can't jump far. I looked for five minutes. Gone. A total mystery. I was about to get a new one, when I decided to look under-behind the desk, with a flashlight. The fish was there, very dried. Pretty stiff. I got him. And I had a sadz. So I decided to feed it to the crab. The crab just sits there, all year, waiting to have freshly dead fish thrown at him. But the fished kicked in my hand.. She was on the carpet (that'll dry them right out), by the power-strip, an easy 5, probably 7+, maybe even 10 minutes. I sprinkled water on her, and she arose! She was pretty mad by now. So I put her in the tank. It's been an hour. I guess she'll adapt. In a year, there will be 700 very in-bred babies in there. They'll have the same colors as her. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Administrators Eric Posted September 11, 2021 Author Administrators Share Posted September 11, 2021 3 minutes ago, Huaco Kid said: This really just happened. So, I have a 2-gallon aquarium on my desk right in front of my face, for decades, that I usually had a betta in. (I could keep a beta alive for 5+ years), but it's been a long time. It's been an empty, bubbling tank. On the other wall is a 45 gal, that I always grew (tiger) oscar's in. (the last one was as big as a football, and 10+ years when he got too big for it. I was trying to give him away, but he floated. So now there's only 50 guppies and and the red-tailed shark (not a rainbow shark, they're gay) in there. I put them all in 10 years ago. The shark was 1" long (he's easily 7+ years). Now he's probably pushing 5". He owns the roost. If I'm gone too long, he just eats 50 baby guppies. The guppy population has maintained itself exactly the same for a long time. They're probably all pretty in-bred, by now. So I decided to put some guppies in the little tank. Like a little guppy farm. In case the shark gets hungry. I picked a M and a F from the big tank. Put them in a cup, was floating the cup for temp, and noticed that one had already got out. So I dumped the cup into the tank. But there was only one fish in the tank. I checked the tank, cup, desk, ten times. One fish. Gone. I know it jumped out. They can't jump far. I looked for five minutes. Gone. A total mystery. I was about to get a new one, when I decided to look under-behind the desk, with a flashlight. The fish was there, very dried. Pretty stiff. I got him. And I had a sadz. So I decided to feed it to the crab. The crab just sits there, all year, waiting to have freshly dead fish thrown at him. But the fished kicked in my hand.. She was on the carpet (that'll dry them right out), by the power-strip, an easy 5, probably 7+, maybe even 10 minutes. I sprinkled water on her, and she arose! She was pretty mad by now. So I put her in the tank. It's been an hour. I guess she'll adapt. In a year, there will be 700 very in-bred babies in there. They'll have the same colors as her. Yeah, but the whole brood will be plotting your demise. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 One male, one female, plucked out of Metropolis, and thrown into isolation, all by themselves. He's banging her five times per minute. Guppies only take .2 seconds. 200 times per day. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 14 minutes ago, Eric said: Yeah, but the whole brood will be plotting your demise. Crabs can plot, actually get loose, and deploy. His purple claw is as big as a quarter now. I'd put guppies on my neck, all day. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Administrators Eric Posted September 11, 2021 Author Administrators Share Posted September 11, 2021 13 minutes ago, Huaco Kid said: Crabs can plot, actually get loose, and deploy. His purple claw is as big as a quarter now. I'd put guppies on my neck, all day. What if the guppies convince the crab that you are just a really big fish? It'll be Planet of the Fish and we are all out of Charlton Heston! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 He's getting her, like, 50 times per minute. She might be used to it, being from Metropolis, and all. It's kind of rapey. So I could put another male in there, and they'll just constantly fight all day, and, leave her, for happily ever after, alone. Or she'll just get it 100 times per minute. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 It's like Adam and Eve. We'll just see what kind of civilization they grow. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 She'll probably have babies tomorrow. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 8 minutes ago, Eric said: What if the guppies convince the crab....... Crabs don't need convincing. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Administrators Eric Posted September 11, 2021 Author Administrators Share Posted September 11, 2021 1 minute ago, Huaco Kid said: Crabs don't need convincing. I had to convince some crabs to vacate my fun zone once, when I was in the Army. Never did figure out where I picked them up. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 I worked at gas stations, since I was old enough to work. And carried a Zippo for, probably, much of that. That part never entered my mind. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 The best part of gas station work, is trying to take someone's expired credit card. We'd get a bonus for capturing an expired Gulf card. But, small-town Texans don't like you taking their card. "But, Sir! It expired last year." "Do you want your face in that boot-cleaner over there, or do you want to give me my card back?" "Have a nice day." 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 I once (ok, regularly), for the mayor of Magnolia, did his gas , he came in on Christmas Eve. We had beer in the pop machine, and had been there all day. He had a Cadillac, baby blue, that long, and actually had steer horns on the hood. There was no gas-cap on the sides. I knew it was behind the license plate, like all the 70's did. But it wasn't. So I ripped the mayor's plate off his car, and he didn't even notice, he was getting a Coke, or something, so I gently set it back. The gas was behind his front headlight, or somewhere. I never got yelled at. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huaco Kid Posted September 11, 2021 Share Posted September 11, 2021 DOMOP ,Dirty Old Man Of Pinehurst, it was his license plate, was the owner's dad. He was 100. His Cadillac was a football field. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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